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February 2012
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Oh dear. JEdward have got the Irish gig for Eurovision again. I use the term gig loosely as it would imply some sort of co-ordination between the rhythm of a track and the movements of their limbs. I also use the term song loosely if your first experience of the song Waterline is the first video below. The singing in rubbish and the dancing hilarious - one of them seems always to react about half a second later than the other, reminiscent of one of the One Direction boys so maybe it's a modern boy thing.

However, and this is a big however... if you listen instead to the track below (and can avoid wondering who on earth chose the cute picture) you'll realise that this is one remarkably well-written track and, if they can be persuaded merely to mime and not move too much to this as the backing track that everyone actually hears on the day, then I can see this a potential winner.

As I said. Oh dear.

Have to promote this track from a cool guy and good friend of my son's. Jeremy's written plenty of great original material too and good luck to both of them. I just know I'll be listening to Dermot O'Leary one Sunday afternoon before long and they'll be on their way.

The official blurb says Jeremy Warmsley and Elizabeth Sankey are a bona fide couple and make up London-based duo Summer Camp, who cover their favourite British love song for the Mix Tape Tour.

Summer Camp cover "Everywhere" from Mulberry Mixtape on Vimeo.

After several years of quite serious ballads, many sung by the same person too, Malta has made an effort to modernise its entry for 2012. Some dj, two nerdy-looking guitarists and a couple of girls, one in sparkly pants playing drums standing up, possibly because the pants were too tight to sit down, add the youth background to the main guy, Kurt, who has probably been told to grow the beard to help with the image of Malta being ever-so-slightly young and rebellious this year. They got the ever-so-slightly bit right, I guess.

This is actually very straightforward stuff but it does have a catchy chorus with its yeah - ey - ey - ey- yeah bit which will no doubt get remembered by all those people in the voting lands more than some others so it ought to earn Malta a good number of mid-range points. Near the end you get the impression that the girl is going to join in and take some of the lead but she doesn't. It might have been better if she had, just for a bit of a change. In classic Eurovision style, this is instantly recognisable, you know where it's going and, apart from one odd stop and start, it's all pleasantly predictable.

Kurt will need to find a better fitting pair of trousers, though, on the night. Maybe he can borrow the drummer's.

Another great new track. This one's from Karmin, who I thought must come from Ireland for some reason but actually hail from Boston. Not Boston, Lincs but Boston, New England, Massachusetts. Good pop and jazz and a little modern rap thrown in for good measure. Not sure about Amy's dancing in the rap breaks but nice to see a live band genuinely live here and this goes in the Hit selection of my 2012 Juke Box Jury. Whatever happened to that show?

It's just as well the States are excluded from Eurovision!

Whatever happens in May, you'll be hearing this as it's bound to be an enormous summer hit throughout Europe. One day the States will get it too but not just yet. We're talking Trance, JLS, Lady Gaga, short skirt, legs, Night Club and almost every hook and trick that can be thrown into a pop song. There's some annoying autotune and the otherwise lovely Ivi Adamou does have a slightly unnervingly large mouth but this is the track that should bring Cyprus douze points from nations other just the traditional UK. It's all good late 90s stuff and if Ivi performs well on the night this could be a winner.

Perhaps next time they record her for the official site they might try and persuade the audience to look a bit happier (getting some young people in there would be a good idea for a start) and someone needs to give the girl some ideas as to what to do with her legs which occasionally seem to be at odds with each other.

Now here's a performer that should guarantee Norway a few million votes from admiring young females, and no doubt plenty of males too I suppose. This is Eurovision, I must remind myself. Impossible good looks, a lot of gyrating, all the grasping-the-air and clenching-fist moves you can eat and a track that could have been a Wham 'B' side. All good stuff and this should see Norway in the points again this year. Well, it could if they can attend to a couple of things - they need to get rid of the extraordinarily ugly dancers or even the younger viewers will be put off and the name. I mean, Tooji! Good grief. C'mon Norway PR people, get your act together.

Iceland have been nothing if not original in many of their efforts in the past to get us all to Reyjavik one year so it is a bit of a surprise to find them with a commercial number for 2012. Nice violin and a strong pop ballad from two reasonably good-looking singers in smart evening dress. The blonde female sings and plays the violin which gets dumped somewhere as as she and the guy do the touch hands bit and get into gear for the build up at the end. It's just all a bit late, though. That was 2010 or 2011. Still, for all I know it could be the theme that 2012 voters like too so it stands an outside chance as things stand at the moment. Here's the live version at the show where they won the local competition. Sorry about the red flashes which I guess come from the trial software used by whoever published this.

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